Is nannying abroad a good career prospect? Having worked in Europe and mingled with many other nannies, hearing different opinions, I think I gained a good perspective on it. I have preferred short-time positions of a few months, to allow me to get home more often, and I've found the pay is better in temporary jobs, which also give more variety.
My first post was in Seville, Spain, as an au pair and English teacher for three children. I had received little information from my agency and only spoke by phone with the se$ora to arrange my arrival time. I found Spain fascinating, both ancient and modern, and I made many friends, but my employer was very strict and formal and possessed only a cool friendliness.
She thought her three spoiled children could do no wrong (an attitude that many Spanish families seemed to have). The other au pairs in the area said their se$oras were more informal with them and less strict. But the benefits outweighed the negatives. The weather was great and we spent two summer months at the family's seaside villa in Cadiz, where I met other au pairs. I also had the opportunity to earn extra cash by teaching English to teenage students in my spare time.
A few years later I returned, this time to Madrid as a nanny for a Scottish couple. I went through a reputable English agency which had links with other agencies in Europe. I spoke for 45 minutes collect on the phone with my employer, and had everything agreed mutually. My duties and days off were pre-arranged, and the three-year-old girl was a delight to care for.
The following year I went to work in Brussels, Belgium, for a family with four children. The au pair whom I was to be replacing recommended the family and wrote to me explaining the duties and all the family's little ways. It all sounded great and I was looking forward to it. But I was in for a shock. On my first night there the children's parents spent most of the evening complaining about their previous au pairs. This made me wonder what they would say about me later on. They also informed me that they had arranged French lessons for me which I was obliged to pay for myself, as my French was poor and the family spoke little English. A cleaner came daily and the children were well-behaved, though a bit wild. My day was non-stop until nearly ten at night. I was asked to eat out on two evenings a week to give them some privacy, but wasn't offered any money towards it. The mother always cooked the evening meal, which was usually sparse. There would be one potato for each person and if I wanted more, she would say 'food finished'.
This experience showed me that even when you go through a reputable agency and hear recommendations from your predecessors, things aren't always what they appear. Luckily I met some English-speaking people, among them a lady who lived in the same street who helped me to find another position through an advertisement in a newspaper.
My prospective new employer arrived in Brussels to take me to her home for an interview. After giving my family a week's notice, I went to south Belgium to care for three young children living in a beautiful old castle.
They were one of the nicest families I had ever met, treating me like their own daughter. Food was plentiful, and they arranged for me to have a lift to Brussels on my day off if I wanted.
That post encouraged me to keep travelling. My next stop was Rome, as a nanny caring for a three-month-old baby. This time I went through a different agency, which had a sister agency in Rome; if a nanny wasn't happy she could go to them and they would find her a different family. I spoke to the mother on the phone. She said that if I would be willing to help a little with the housework, I would have one full day and two afternoons off. At first I found the apartment cramped, with a tiny kitchen and bathroom. It had only two bedrooms, which meant I had to take the baby into my room for playtime. It was just after Christmas and everything looked bleak. But the family were lovely and the mother treated me like a sister. She rose early in the morning to do some of the housework herself, which made me eager to do my share. For holidays we went to her family in Naples, who had a huge apartment on top of a hill and welcomed me with gusto. They had a large staff but I was invited to eat with the family.
During my stay in Rome I met lots of other nannies and explored what is a great place for sightseeing and socialising. There is something for everyone - shops, bars, clubs, culture, ancient history, trips to the beach or to little villages. I discovered an Irish pub and an English pub that were great places to make friends. I enjoyed this time so much that I extended my six-month stay to a year.
In fact, I liked Italy so much that I returned again. First, the agency offered me two weeks as a relief nanny to a millionaire in Florence. I accepted it because the baby I was going to mind in Milan was only a couple of weeks old and wouldn't need a nanny just yet. But I was glad when that two weeks finished. The family lived in a large secluded villa with about ten guard dogs and were overly security-conscious. I was not allowed to leave the grounds with the little boy in case he was kidnapped. The mother, who spent most of her day entertaining and grooming herself, was overly protective. She would frequently come to the playroom to see if I was doing my job properly. I was required to wear a uniform at all times.
I was glad to escape to Milan, though I didn't know what awaited me - I had not spoken with them previously on the phone, because the mother had been in hospital with the baby. In fact, the first month was spent on the coast with her parents. They had other staff and I could not eat with the family - which I didn't mind, as sitting with their extended family would have been overwhelming -but my food was prepared and given to me by the cook.
Then I stayed with them in Milan, in a large apartment near the centre, for another six months. The mother was still on maternity leave, so we visited different places regularly. The family didn't mind me going out at night once they saw that it didn't interfere with my work and that I could look after myself, though it did not seem usual for the Italian girls to stay out late at pubs or discos.
Socialising can be a bit daunting abroad, but you do meet other nannies when you take the children to school or to the park. On my first day off in Milan I heard English voices on the tram. I went up to two girls and just said, 'Excuse me, I heard your voices and wondered if you are nannies?'
They were tourists but they were visiting a sister who was a nanny, and she happened to be friendly with a lot of models. They took my phone number and, to cut a long story short, this one contact resulted in me making an excellent friend and when I went home I was given two bags of designer clothes by one of the models my friend knew.
A good agency can always give you the names and phone numbers of other nannies and au pairs you can contact. And employers often have friends who also employ nannies.
It really is pot luck you have to take when you work abroad. I would advise nannies to speak to the family beforehand about the duties expected, and to make sure there will be back-up from an agency in that country in case the position doesn't work out. It may take a few weeks to settle in, but it will most likely be worthwhile to stick it out.
Ella Lovelock is a former nanny in Drogheda, Republic of Ireland
