Survey highlights strain of lockdown on parents and children's mental health

The charity says it has seen a surge in demand of 415 per cent for parenting advice during the three months of lockdown and is launching Parent Talk https://parents.actionforchildren.org.uk, a new free online parenting advice service in response.

It provides a confidential one-to-one online chat service to give parents somewhere to turn for free, practical advice and emotional support.

The charity is urging the Government to prioritise children’s mental health in the Covid recovery planning, and provide adequate funding to meet the rise in demand.

A YouGov survey of over 2,000 parents of children aged 18 and under, published by Action for Children today ( 14 July), highlights how parents and children are struggling to cope with issues caused by life in lockdown. 

The findings show that:

• 36 per cent of children are feeling lonely and isolated
• 28 per cent of children reported as anxious and 25 per cent reported as unable to sleep.
• For parents, 31 per cent were experiencing loneliness and 38 per cent experiencing sleep problems.

The survey was carried out online between 16-22 June.

Action for Children said lockdown has left parents reeling, with four in ten (43 per cent) feeling anxious and one in three (33 per cent) admitting to being out of their depth when it came to supporting their children during the lockdown. Many are also experiencing the same loneliness and sleep problems that their children are. 

Even with restrictions easing, parents are fearful about the weeks and months of uncertainty ahead. More than one in three (37 per cent) say they are worried their children will struggle to socialise and will want to stay at home. Parents' experiences included their children ‘bedwetting’, becoming ‘clingy and unsure’ and not ‘wanting to go outside’. Others reported ‘disordered eating’, that their child had become ‘weepy’, ‘frustrated’ or ‘scared of people’ outside their home.

One mum said, ‘My daughter’s behaviour has deteriorated to a worrying level – major temper tantrums and night terrors almost every night… we are so worried for her.’

Another mum said, 'Before lockdown started, my daughter, who was adopted, was already having difficulty in school maintaining friendships and now, because of lockdown, she has had very little contact with any other children because she just does not have any friends. Her behaviour has deteriorated to a worrying level, becoming very argumentative, having major temper tantrums, reminiscing constantly about her past and having night terrors almost every night. She is desperate to return to school and see other children, but we are concerned that when she does eventually have the chance to return to school that she will struggle enormously. She has definitely regressed emotionally and we are so worried for her.'

Lynn Giles, Parent Talk manager at Action for Children, said, ‘The pandemic has triggered a crisis for mums, dads and children on an unprecedented scale, with parents feeling overwhelmed without their usual support from friends and family, or any certainty for the future. 

‘Huge numbers of children will need extra support over the coming months and parents are telling us they don’t know where to turn. As the immediate health crisis passes we now need to turn our attention to the scars coronavirus has left on families struggling with a whole new reality -  with many grieving from having lost loved ones, and others worrying about their jobs and their futures.  

‘With so many mums and dads in desperate need of guidance, a service like Parent Talk is needed now more than ever. Our parent coaches are there for any questions parents have – big or small. Anyone who needs a bit of support in these tough times can go to parent-talk.org.uk.’

Commenting on the findings, Sarah Hannafin, senior policy advisor for school leaders' union NAHT, said, ‘School leaders are deeply concerned about the impact the Covid-19 pandemic and lockdown may have had on children and young people’s mental health and wellbeing.

‘Throughout the pandemic schools have been engaging with specific pupils who need social and emotional support, and this will continue to be a priority next year.

‘NAHT has worked in partnership with the Anna Freud Centre and the PSHE Association to create detailed practical guidance aiming to help school leaders and their staff, in all phases of education, support children and young people with their mental health and well-being in light of the impact of the coronavirus pandemic.

‘Whilst schools will ensure that all pupils are supported as they return in September, we recognise there will be groups of children and young people for whom the impact of the coronavirus pandemic has created more serious levels of concern. These pupils may need additional, more targeted support and they will likely need more specialist help from health or social care services. These services were stretched before the pandemic and government must ensure their capacity is increased. It is vital that schools are able to access that support for their pupils quickly and that there is help available for parents too.’

Case study

Nikki Wallis, 32, lives with her partner Adam, 30 in Selkirk, Scotland. The couple have four daughters, Katelynn, 10, Macey 8, Quinn, 5 and Carly, 2, all of whom have been struggling.

‘It’s the uncertainty of everything that has made my anxiety and depression so bad. When the kids ask me questions I just don’t know any of the answers and can’t reassure them about anything. They’ll ask about school and what will happen if there is a second wave but no one knows what is happening. When I can’t tell the kids anything that’s when the anxiety builds up.

‘Macey has just turned eight and she’s gone from a quite spirited, happy child to a little girl who’s not interested in anything and her attitude and behaviour over the last few weeks has been an issue. Even my eldest, who usually takes everything in her stride has started to struggle. She hasn’t seen her Dad, my ex-partner, for months as he works for the NHS and she has health problems. She misses him and is so emotional all the time. She is becoming more withdrawn and staying in her room. ‘The two youngest ones don’t really understand what’s going on but I’m worried about them returning to school and nursery. If the staff are wearing masks I think that will scare them more than anything. Before lockdown my youngest had sleep issues, and they have worsened now. 

‘It gets so confusing and you just can’t give the kids any routine whereas before all of this we had a really strict routine and everyone knew exactly how their day was going to be. Now we’ve got nothing.’