Analysis: Helping parents to give 'tough love'
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
New research has concluded that a particular parenting style creates the best prospects for future society. Karen Faux hears some of the reactions.
Built on its title and premise - 'Parents are the architects of a fairer society' - the latest published report from think-tank Demos is specific in advocating 'tough love' as the most effective parenting style.
It purports that confident, skilful parents adopting an approach that balances warmth with discipline can engender the key character capabilities of application, self-regulation and empathy.
The report says that early years policy should focus clearly on delivering initiatives that support the development of these character traits. According to its authors, Richard Reeves and Jen Lexmond, 'Achieving this will require a greater understanding in public policy of what factors contribute to the development of these character capabilities as children grow up.'
With initiatives such as the National Academy of Parenting Practitioners and Parents, Early Years and Learning (PEAL) underlining the increasing emphasis on effectively working with parents, can this report inform policy going forward, in a meaningful way?
Existing initiatives
At PEAL, principal officer Joyce O'Connor says the report is welcomed.
'PEAL arose from an initial project funded by the DCSF in 2005 to April 2007 as a consortium run by NCB, Coram Family and the London borough of Camden. The training developed on the project continues to be rolled out by NCB to local authorities to support practitioners in developing work to engage parents in their children's learning.
'We would therefore welcome clear policy that embeds good practice around involving parents in young children's learning, rather than new initiatives. There is strong evidence of what helps parents feel confident in their role as educators of their young children, and which supports our aim for all early years services and settings to be working in genuine partnership with them.'
For Renuka Jeyarajah-Dent, director of operations at Coram, the findings of the report are not new, but she supports its recognition that the state has an important role in supporting vulnerable parents. Coram provides a range of family services, including adoption and housing support.
'It reminds me of all the important theories, and the ones which are central to our work at Coram, including those to do with resilience and attachment, and how factors can get in the way of their healthy development.
'As a state, we have a responsibility to make sure that parents are stress-free enough be responsive parents. Often it is a case of the simple things making a difference, which comes down to timely intervention.
'Educational outcomes still correlate closely with class, and it matters to us that an average-ability middle class child will still do better than a clever working class child.'
Ms Jeyarajah-Dent believes the report considers issues which any civilised society should. 'It is worrying for the Government that we have so many children being brought up in single-parent and reconstituted families - not because they are bad in themselves, but because they are often isolated and lacking in support.
'Bringing up children requires the fulfilment of a whole range of tasks, many of which are emotional and involve problem-solving for children. Where vulnerable parents are concerned, Coram aims to help with that problem-solving.'
Need to refocus
The National Academy for Parenting Practitioners is a sponsor of the Demos report. The Academy is currently rolling out the last aspects of its evidence-based training before its three-year funding runs out in 2010.
Its achievements have included providing over 4,000 places on evidence-based parenting programmes to ensure that all local authorities are working towards a fully trained and supported parenting workforce. It has given over 700 practitioners the latest information and evidence for working with particular groups of parents, such as young parents, parents of children with disabilities and parents who misuse substances. Its five-year research programme looking at effective evidence-based strategies will continue beyond 2010.
The Academy believes that the Demos report succeeds in addressing how public policy can best support parents and children in developing the capabilities necessary for success in today's world.
The report advocates that Sure Start should be retained but refocused to its original mission around child development and support for disadvantaged families. At the same time, it says that greater emphasis in the early years initiatives delivered via Sure Start - including the Family Nurse Partnership* - should be centred on parental style and skills, and on the development of character capabilities that underpin so many, later outcomes. It also suggests that Sure Start could act as a more effective hub, creating peer relationships that can be central to parent support.
Other proposals include giving health visitors a specific role supporting parenting style and a programme of 'parent-child interaction tests' to measure warmth, responsiveness and attunement between the parent and child.
The report cautions that only interventions that have a proven impact should be funded. It purports that the National Academy of Parenting Practitioners has the potential to use its institutional knowledge to act as a qualifying authority for parenting interventions, whereby local authorities would only be permitted to spend on programmes with its stamp of approval.
The report concludes that there would be considerable scope for local funders to choose interventions suitable for their locality and population, but not to use monies raised from general taxation on unproven interventions.
Both parents count
Despite so many parenting initiatives, the early years and wider professional workforce is still trying to get to grips with the best way to work with parents - and that means fathers as well.
At the Fatherhood Institute, research manager Adrienne Burgess says, 'The problem with a lot of studies is that data on fathers simply isn't there, and at least the report acknowledges this.
'When it comes to the importance of parenting styles, the need for confident fathers is extremely important as well. In our work with professionals and nurseries we stress the importance of inviting fathers in, rather than assuming they will not want to be involved.'
Ms Burgess recognises the success of the Family Nurse Partnership in working with fathers. 'It is part of their remit to ask about fathers and involve them. Evidence shows that with very young mothers, at least 80 per cent of them are in relationships, and that can be supported.'
One thing that surprises Ms Burgess is the lack of focus in the report on the relationship between parents themselves.
'Very little is mentioned about the quality of the couple relationship, which is so important for child character,' she says. 'Where practitioners work with couples to find out how they engage together on their child's upbringing, outcomes can be improved.'
Inevitably, not everyone agrees that the Demos report fulfils its remit to deliver hard-edged policy solutions, and parents themselves seem divided on just how far the 'tough love' model should be called to account for creating perfect citizens.
As one online poster responded to The Observer's article on the report, 'There is evil parenting and then there is everything else, which is not all equal'. This seems to sum up the views of many.
But with the possibility of a new Government fast approaching, the report is a timely reminder that parenting must remain a vital focus for the early years if every child is to have the best chance in life.
Further information
www.demos.co.uk/publications/parenting
- The Family Nurse Partnership is a British version of a highly successful US programme which provides intensive home visiting for 'vulnerable' first-time young mothers by specially trained midwives and health visitors.