Positive Relationships: Working With Parents - A full picture

There are two levels of your communication with parents - enabling parents to communicate their knowledge of their child to you, and enabling you to communicate your knowledge of their child to them.

Our relationship with a child begins at the very first encounter, probably when a parent or carer comes in to complete an application form for a place or at the time of enrolment. This is when the parents form a first impression of us, as people who can be trusted, and who try to be helpful, supportive and communicative. It is also when we form impressions of who might need a bit more support, and what form that might take. It also depends on us having a clear understanding that to help the family is to help the child.

It is important to be clear that communication is a two-way process. It is the foundation of the trusting relationships we seek to build.

Throughout the time the child is with you, you will see and hear how that child tries to make sense of his or her world, for yourself, directly. But yours is not the only picture, as children often show a different side to themselves in your setting than those they show at home.

You may have daily or regular contact with the parent or carer, and much can be learned through informal conversation about how the child is doing at home and with you. This may also provide an informal opportunity to give the parents some support.

It is important to acknowledge that parenting is the most difficult and yet the most important thing we ever do. That may help us to be non-judgemental.

There will also be more formal times with parents, with the clear objective of exchanging information to help us see where we need to go next. Individual child/pupil profiles are a way in which everyone can contribute to the knowledge of the child, to their greater benefit.

It is important to see this exchange with parents as a process of building relationships, not just a series of interviews, and for them to feel included in their children's growth and development.

EXERCISE

Use the following questions to reflect as a team on your relationship with parents in your setting:

First impressions

• What is your understanding of what makes for a trusting relationship?

• What work have you done as a team to present yourselves as confident, reassuring, skilled, approachable and effective?

• How often do you evaluate this and develop it?

Continuing to be effective through shared communication

• What systems and procedures are in place to make time for sharing information with parents?

• How do you take parents' input into account?

• How do parents know that you have taken their input into account?

This is an extract from The cycle of observation, assessment and planning: a guide for early years practitioners, published by Children in Scotland. Practical and easy to navigate, this resource provides the basic information and reflective exercises needed to make the planning cycle a meaningful part of practitioners' daily routine. To order a copy, visit www.childreninscotland.org.uk or email publications@childreninscotland.org.uk.